“I have to get back to work or else I and my child will starve.”  This is one foundation of strength by several mothers who have to work back after spending their maternity leaves with their newly born child. They exploit this thought, to somehow prevail over the separation anxiety. For how many months she has lived with her child, being with and having each other everyday, since the day he is born. The special bond that is formed when they’re together is one reason why it is so difficult to leave him and get back to work.

 Separation anxiety is inevitable to a child, likewise, to the parents, in particular the mothers. It is a kind of fear that dominates the heart of a child during the times when his/her dear parent has to depart for work, to shop, or travel to far places for a certain period of time. It can occur to both toddlers and infants. Such feeling is indeed so difficult for a child to bear. On the other hand, it would cause parents, particularly mothers, to suffer from an irresistible guiltiness for leaving her child to other people’s custody. 

Regardless of the reality that this is just part of the childhood phases, it is necessary to discern the appropriate methods to help your child deal with the separation anxiety. With these approaches, your child will pass through this certain stage, easily and with lesser awful feelings than you thought. 

• Be positive. Show to your child that everything is fine, prior to leaving him. In order to assure him, stay calm and be positive. Talk to him with a positive tone of voice. If he cries, never get mad nor yell at him, else, things will get worse.
• Never show tears. At first, you may not help your self but cry. However, as much as possible, control your emotions and manage to stay composed. Remember that when your child sees you crying, he would feel so distress and this may trigger him to cry too.
• Keep your parting time quick. Say a quick goodbye to your child. You can give him a kiss and hug him for a moment, enough for you to give the comfort he needs for the time you are gone. Consoling him, especially if he cries, is fine but be sure you won’t be coming in late to the office.
• Give him time to get used to with his new caregiver. It is necessary to give your child enough time to adjust with his caregiver or anyone you choose to take care of him when you leave. This will help him feel at ease and comfortable with that person, thereby, helping him develops his trust and feels secured when they’re together.
• Establish a special routine together. One good way to make it easier is to go through a special routine together, prior to leaving him. While doing such habit, talk to him in the most positive approach and explain to him you need to work and leave him for a moment. And assure him that you will definitely be back shortly. No matter how young he is, if you say those words in the finest way you could, he would surely understand. 

Dealing with separation anxiety in not that easy at first, though you have to do the best that you could just to help you child overcome the feeling. All you need to possess is a positive attitude — persistence, determination and open-mindedness. As parent, you are responsible to facilitate your child, to cope up with such apprehension, for him to move on to the next phase of his childhood.

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